Sunday, October 26, 2008

Atonement

The title of the book is contrary in relation to the characters in the novel thus making it frivolous and insignificant. The analogous exemplification would be for the Jews to rename Mein Kempf to atonement. Point being, none of the idiots in the story reached atonement. Paul Marshall, the first idiot and almost the most hated character in the story second to Briony is the real life bedroom version of the role play game adults utilize to spice up their sex life called F$#* me daddy. Well close – Lola isn’t Paul’s daughter but she is 13 and Paul is the pedophile pretend daddy having his name screamed late at night. This Houdini manages to somehow use trickery and dodge the anal Jericho Missile (See Movie Iron Man) that was targeted to stampede through his rectum from years of prison by pawning it off to the second idiot, Robbie. Robbie’s character apparently has a huge “L” stamped on his forehead and a tattoo on his ass that says “Wide Receiver”. When the time comes to defend Robbie’s accusations of rape no one stands up for him not even the women that loves him which brings us to our third idiot, Cecilia. What kind of women doesn’t stand up to the man she is supposedly destined to be with and have her destiny stripped away from her by the words of a little adolescent girl. Helen Keller would have even mustered up an “F U”. Two characters left…and I’m already second guessing my “who’s the biggest idiot” character so I’m going to put it at a tie for now. Idiot A) tied for last goes to Lola. Either Lola liked being treated like Bowden’s daughter playing center lineman and having balls pass repeatedly through her legs or she realized that screaming Paul’s name was even better than Daddy because either way she kept her mouth shut during the entire story about the truth of her rapist. Here is an alternate ending scenario. Envision Lola being 18 years of age coming clean with the rape story and the court ruling that she gets a 30 second head start on foot with nancy boy Robbie chasing her in a tank. Imagine Robbie, who has been in prison and the war, magically growing a sack and chasing her down, ravaging her like a drunken Ted Bundy followed by an episode of nip/tuck with a female circumcision. Ok B) tied for biggest idiot BRIONY. I have never watched a movie and wanted to find the actor playing the part and physically beat them. Briony’s problem is that Robbie doesn’t like to play pop goes the little girl cherry with her and once she realizes that Robbie is in love with her sister she becomes consumed with jealously. All the rubbish about how she was confused and didn’t know what was going on in the library is ignorance. Briony was 13 and didn’t have a mental disability hindering her ability to comprehend the real world. She wasn’t a chromy 21 baby living in Saudi Arabia yelling “LALALA JIHAD”. She was a horny adolescent girl who was in LOVE with Robbie and decided that if she couldn’t have Robbie no one could…except maybe the 200 pound prison men that love little nancy boy’s. The alternate ending for Briony would be similar to that of the oracles in 300 being ravaged by the monstrous Ephors. Except she would be in a mental institution and lines of mental midgets would line up daily to rape her.

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